“I contend that we are both atheists. I just believe in one fewer god than you do. When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours.”
– Stephen Roberts

“Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able?
Then he is not omnipotent.
Is he able, but not willing? Then he is malevolent.
Is he both able and willing? Then whence cometh evil?
Is he neither able nor willing? Then why call him God?”
- Epicurus

“Don’t you know there ain’t no devil, it’s just god when he’s drunk.”
– Tom Waits

You know your god is man-made when he hates all the same people you do.
–[from Usenet]

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